Her name is Lucky. We got her when I was in kindergarten I think. When I was around 4 or 5 probably. I remember going to get her. The family we bought her from had a bunch of border collie puppies. But she was special. Well, at least a little more special than her litter mates.
Lucky wasn't breathing when she was born. She was given CPR (or something along that matter) and she lived. She was the smallest puppy in the litter. That's why she was called Lucky. Because she was so sick when she was first born she lived in the house with the family and their son (about the same age as me at that point or a few years older). I remember the son was mad that she was the one that we wanted out of the whole litter. When I think back on it now, I feel sad that we took her from him but blessed that I had her in my life.
We grew up together. She'd pull me down the road while I was on roller blades and we'd share my ice cream cones (gross now that I think about it) and eat bubbles and romp around with me. She chased out cats and got into general dog related mischief.
Lucky stayed with us when we moved to a different state. The transition to a large house with a yard to a small townhouse with no yard didn't go too well. Border Collies are running dogs. And even though she was older she still needed more space than we had to offer. So she went to live with my grandparents in another town. That was awful, being separated from her. We could only visit her a few times a month because my parents were working to find a house for us to live in. I think her living away from us made it is we missed the better years of her adult life.
After we finally secured a house she came back to live with us (almost 2 years away from her). Lucky was not a puppy any more though. She wasn't young either. She'd walk different cause of her arthritis and got tired quickly. Soon she got to where she couldn't walk up stairs without falling or being carried.
Those were the worst years. Her skin became very sensitive so we couldn't brush her or play with her too hard. She'd sleep a lot. Soon my dad was taking her to the vet more often.
I had to prepare myself. I knew within the next few years Lucky wasn't going to be with us any more.
She was with us for a little over 3 years in the new house. It was some time after my birthday, but before I graduated that she took a turn for the worst. My dad was dragging it out (he was closest to her probably though we were all really close to that dog). I got mad at him a lot cause I was tired. I was tired of watching my friend die. But I was even more tired of seeing how she hurt so much and that my parents were allowing it because they didn't want to take her to the vet yet. Thinking maybe the new medicine would work maybe she'll get better.
I was sitting in my ceramics class when my teacher got a call from the office saying I was dismissed for the day. (it was pretty early in the morning and I only went to school for only half the day till 10:15 so I was surprised). But it hit me before I even left the class. Something was wrong. My sister was called out to leave and I met her while walking to the front of the school. My mom was there and she was crying. And then I knew.
Lucky was 14 years old. The vet said she probably had blood cancer (along with other complications as well). She had just given up. You could see it in her face when we got home. My parents let us say bye to her before they took her to the vet. It was the worst feeling of my life. I had already experienced it once with one of my cats in 8th grade (she was 19 and that was awful having to let her go). And to go through it again when I was older and understood more was awful. I loved that dog so much.
I still love her even today. She grew up with me and I grew up with her. Having a pet is one of the best and worst things that a person could ever experience. To love someone so much but then to experience that great loss. Some people might not understand this feeling if their pets aren't considered to be more like family like the pets in our house are. But that's okay cause it varies across the board.
I wanted to write this as a response to Becky's update on yourpants about her dog Buddy. I wanted to say that I know what you are going through and how awful it is. I wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss. I also wanted to write this so I could come to terms with my loss. (I am crying right now and I am sure I look extremely unattractive and all snotty and blotchy faced). I miss Lucky so much but I'll never forget her.
I am not going to say that losing your pet is easy and coming to terms with it will be easy as well. Cause I would be a liar if I did. It's not easy. In fact it is an extremely unpleasant experience that I am very unwilling to repeat in the near future. Coping will be hard and will take time. Probably lot's of it.
Becky, I hope that you and your family are as okay as you can be during this time. Though the end is awful, the journey up to that point makes it worth while.
Lucky, I love and miss you, you stinkin' crazy dog. Thank you for being my dog and for letting me be your owner. But more importantly, thank you for making me happy when I was sad. Thank you for being my friend.
DFTBA
-Sarah
^ my stupid dog whom I love and miss very much :')
p.s. I can't stop flippin crying! haha But I think I feel better for having written this. It's a bit late cause it was a bit much for me to handle trying to write this and reliving all the emotions. (I had intended to have it up the night Becky posted her status about her dog on yourpants.....sorry I failed on that part :/ ) But anywhooooo. Thanks for putting up with me and all my blubbering everyone.
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